Dreaming Lewerentz

I dreamed about Lewerentz last night. I finally got to meet him and he was very large and quite old. He showed me his house and we walked up a hill together to meet some people who had gathered to hear him sing. There was much excitement and everyone was so pleased to see him. He sang a beautiful Italian song and then wandered back out into the afternoon. We waited with anticipation for his final song but he didn’t return. I set out to look for him and imagined that he felt he had already sung his last song and had gone home to die. I went to his house and walked quietly among the rooms. Half-open dark grey doors, wooden floors, tall windows and a silhouetted rocker…I recalled him sweetly and let the melancholy of his passing slowly seep into me. “What are you doing here?” he asked, startling me out of my sadness. I was embarrassed—happy to see him alive, but very embarrassed. I tried to explain that I’d come looking for him and he assured me that he’d just come home for a break and had every intention of returning. He found me impatient. Just then his wife appeared in a state of semi-undress in the doorway of their room.